11 Things I Know For Sure About Love

Toya Qualls-Barnette
1 min readFeb 12, 2021

Love has everything to do with anything

A Black woman, eyes closed with a short afro, with pink rhinestones on her face, white hearts pressed on her cheeks and sparkly pink lipstick. Yummy.
Photo by Jessica Felicio on Unsplash

LOVE can seldom be returned in the exact manner of which it is given.

LOVE is the singular reason for all joy and pain.

LOVE is all encompassing in that it can heal a wound or prolong the suffering.

LOVE is never enough in and of itself — it thrives on nutrients of compassion, empathy, sensitivity and understanding.

LOVE is not a concept, commodity or control mechanism — it’s a vehicle of freedom from constriction and ALL that binds.

LOVE is the ultimate sacrifice of oneself — a generosity of spirit where vanity simply has no place.

LOVE can rarely coexist harmoniously with ego — if forced it may eventually morph into inner conflict, self loathing, and destructive behavior.

LOVE is misunderstood — although it finds expression through acts of emotion its meaning is broader and deeper than anyone can hope to contain. It’s unconquerable.

LOVE isn’t a mystery — it’s a timeless gift with the ability to reinvent itself over and over and over again.

LOVE isn’t blind — it sees all even when we wear bejeweled blinders that only sparkle in pitch black darkness.

We do not choose love—LOVE chooses us.



Toya Qualls-Barnette

*Top writer in This Happened To Me| Writing about the impact of relationships|Contributor to Chicken Soup for the Soul| Dreamer|Mother|HSP in drag