I feel your pain so eloquently expressed. I have a cousin who is much older whose mother threw him out the house at 14 years old and continued to disassociate and deny him dignity even after he became a full woman. She continued to call him her son well into his/her 30s always making disparaging remarks whenever she talked to him/her. It was sad to watch. Of course, that was a different generation. They finally came to an understanding much later but the scars never go away. Keep living your truth and stay well.